When I first discovered the BST trend, I was elated. The money made on a sale was all for me (minus shipping and a small Paypal fee). Making $10 - $40 on an item was so much better than collecting pennies (really I'm serious) from the local consignor store. Even better was finding all this classic merchandise and at a steal of the price. Retail be damned! I became pretty good at the BST game, so good, in fact, that friends routinely come to me for help when placing ads. Speaking of friends, I made some new ones through the pages as well...we sometimes will even trade items with eachother in lieu of selling to others. It's fun, it's thrifty, it's environmentally sound...but there's a dark side.
No it's not the urge to buy crap you don't need and spend money you don't have (though that is a problem), it's the fact that these pages have become a space for women to wield power...think Mean Girls version 40.0. We are talking a new generation of Fashion Police, my friends, and it's a lot nastier than anything said by the late Joan Rivers.
Recently I was the recipient of one of these cruel and unusual cyber attacks. It happened on a 30K plus member page of items from my favorite store...which I may or may not have mentioned above. One woman, looking for dresses to wear to bridal showers in New York City asked what we had for sale that might be appropriate, so I did what any helpful (and longing to unload her bulging closet and fill her empy wallet) girl would do. I showed her a dress I had posted a while back that was still sitting in my closet...and on the page. Before I could say Gucci, there was a buzz in my inbox. A moderator...we will call her Stephen King's Carrie...because it in no way resembles her name...sent me a message that I had broken the rules:
"Hi Tara! Admin here...We are very clear in the rules that we don't allow selling to these kinds of posts, and it is grounds for removal without warning as selling in the comments creates all kinds of issues-so please don't let it happen again. Thanks!
"We noticed you haven't commented on the Pinned Post that you've read the rules- which is another strike, sad to say. We also have you commenting with interest on an item from TJ Maxx as well,which is not a valid sale post and should have been reported rather than encouraging it by looking to buy.
This is more than enough to remove you, so I'm sure you can see that it is important to remember which group you're in. Sorry!"
Ok lady, that's it, gloves are OFF! I told SKC that "it's sad how ridiculous these rules have gotten." I asked her if the other posters in the "offensive" posts had been virtually executed and pointed out that she just deprived sellers of a very good customer as over the course of 2016 I had purchased many items. I should have pointed out that I was a collector and over the year had also offered others many hard to find pieces at great prices, but I was so stark raving mad that I didn't think of that part.
Anyway, once the dust settled in my mind I tried to reflect on the positives. The money I would save when things I never knew I needed were no longer flying across my TL, and the fact that there were other groups on which I could just as easily...in fact more easily...sell the same merchandise. I also tried to see things through SKC's eyes.
I began to feel for SKC...who reminds me of the condescending overly academic girls in high school who treated others like they were insignificant as a defense mechanism because in reality they lacked the social skills to try and be friends with them...henceforth why they became overly academic. And despite the fact that SKC looks like she spent far too much time at Lilith Fair and I may not ever covet her fashion sense, I do envy her life. You see, Carrie...may I call you that?...you must have so much free time in order to even have the desire to look up what you deem as infractions on your silly little Facebook page. Last I knew nobody gets paid to run those pages. So basically, while wielding your imaginary power...you're a chump.
I want to let you in on a little secret Carrie...most of us are working real jobs and wrangling families. We are kicking so much ass personally and professionally, that we don't have to hide behind a screen and be the clothing warden. So the next time you want to smack a fellow woman on the wrist for trying to help out another, who may also be too busy or financially strapped to go to the store, and not wanting to be a tattle tale (did you know that nobody likes a tattle tale Carrie?) please think of me. Think of how I was so busy working full time, raising two thoughtful and kind humans, and trying to be a good citizen that I didn't have time to memorize your laundry list of rules and read your bible length pinned post. Think of me, and then stop yourself from excommunicating another fellow woman who is just trying to do the best she can and save or earn a buck or two on the side.
*Miles logged this week 7. Days until Marathon 301.
Anyway, once the dust settled in my mind I tried to reflect on the positives. The money I would save when things I never knew I needed were no longer flying across my TL, and the fact that there were other groups on which I could just as easily...in fact more easily...sell the same merchandise. I also tried to see things through SKC's eyes.
I began to feel for SKC...who reminds me of the condescending overly academic girls in high school who treated others like they were insignificant as a defense mechanism because in reality they lacked the social skills to try and be friends with them...henceforth why they became overly academic. And despite the fact that SKC looks like she spent far too much time at Lilith Fair and I may not ever covet her fashion sense, I do envy her life. You see, Carrie...may I call you that?...you must have so much free time in order to even have the desire to look up what you deem as infractions on your silly little Facebook page. Last I knew nobody gets paid to run those pages. So basically, while wielding your imaginary power...you're a chump.
I want to let you in on a little secret Carrie...most of us are working real jobs and wrangling families. We are kicking so much ass personally and professionally, that we don't have to hide behind a screen and be the clothing warden. So the next time you want to smack a fellow woman on the wrist for trying to help out another, who may also be too busy or financially strapped to go to the store, and not wanting to be a tattle tale (did you know that nobody likes a tattle tale Carrie?) please think of me. Think of how I was so busy working full time, raising two thoughtful and kind humans, and trying to be a good citizen that I didn't have time to memorize your laundry list of rules and read your bible length pinned post. Think of me, and then stop yourself from excommunicating another fellow woman who is just trying to do the best she can and save or earn a buck or two on the side.
*Miles logged this week 7. Days until Marathon 301.
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